“No crap,” I confirmed.
He started laughing, slowly, but it built to something uncontrollable.
“What?” I managed, barely holding my own laughter back.
“You said crap. What are you, twelve?”
“Hey, I just don’t like to swear, okay?”
“Whatever, you’re a pu—hic—a pushy kind of guy. Ha! See what I did there?”
“Yeah, you got the smarts,” I said, pouring him a new drink. “So you did that sh—tuff, like they could do?”
“Some, I guess. ‘s weird. I feel what they’re talking about, but I just, you know, don’t wannit. Got a job and a life. So they can go fuck themselves.”
“Yeah, they’re real jerks. Dated Kate for a bit.” I clunked a couple more ice cubes in my glass.
“Really? You hit that?”
“Nah, chickened out. She’s too freaky.”
“I hear dat. She fine, though, no doubt. Natalie, too. No fatties, here.”
I nodded, suppressing the urge to hit him.
He’s got the jerk part, down.
“It’s the mebatolism. Real fast.”
“No shtuff,” I grinned.
He grinned, too, and we clinked glasses, drinking some more.
“The powers are pretty cool,” I said.
“Yeah, I guess. But don’t care.”
I nodded. “So, made plans for when you go pop?”
“The fuck you talking about?”
I mimed an explosion coming out his head. “Kasplode, brain guts and crispy body. Real gross.”
“Yup, but you’re a time bomb. Din’t tell ya that part, huh? Unless you learn to control yer powers, you go boom.”
He frowned. “Yer shittin’ me.”
“Nope. Not even a little. See, Kate let me look at their sooper sekrit stuff on the web. Got it all up here,” I pointed to my head. “you will ‘splode or heart attack or sumthin unless you figger it out. Boom. No more you.”