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Friday, April 20, 2012

F3 Dealing with Dwarves

     Dwarves rarely came into the kingdom. When they did, it was either to burn the place down or for trade. Since the town put up decorations and had a parade, it was the latter. I liked dwarves, for the most part. They drank, had rough manners, and liked to fight. It felt just like any of the bars in the Bronx. Unfortunately, the way they came in, it was more like the nice Manhattan bars attacked by people from the wrong end of New Jersey, which was the whole state.

     Every place in town was overrun with dwarves. The City Watch was hard-pressed to maintain order. The Wayfarer was filled to the bursting to the point I couldn't get much in the way of sleep. Still, when you hit the dwarves in the right mood, everything was grand.
     Dwarves loved to sing. They loved to sing drunkenly and off-key, but when it was my intention to be drunk as well, I didn't mind. We went through several songs spilling more sour ale on the floor by clanking wooden tankards then drinking. The night was going well. It wasn't pixie clover drunkenness, but it would do as well. After this round I thought I might play some darts.
     "Heigh Ho!" One of the dwarves began, and every dwarf in the place began echoing it. My night of drunken revelry was ruined. They were going to sing this song until they passed out.
     They never passed out. Damn dwarves.
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