We’ve been
going pretty heavy with Persephone and the Greeks. We need something sexy to
take the weight off. Sounds like a job for the Bible!
After
wiping out the world with the flood and dashing the tower of Babel, we move
into a new chapter with a guy named Abram. One day, God shows up with the
declaration “I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you, and make
your name great” (Gen 12:2) out of the blue. No preamble, no, “Hey, how you
doing?” And this is not something small, either. This is the promise of
becoming kings and a nation, you know, world shattering stuff, since “in you
all the families of the earth shall be blessed” (Gen 12:3). No pressure, Abram.
No pressure.
But it’s
not like there was a snap of fingers, tada, you’re king. God led him to a new
land, proclaiming, “To your offspring I will give this land.” This is
important. I mean, mega important. But not right now; right now Abram is just
making a pit stop. It’s foreshadowing, okay? We’ll get back to it in a few
hundred years. Don’t worry, it’ll go quick.
Abram and
his wife Sarai go into Egypt, and this is where the first of the sexiness takes
place. Abram pulls his wife aside and talks to her because he’s scared for his
life. He’s convinced that the Egyptians will “kill [him], but they will let
[Sarai] live,” (Gen 12:12) if it’s known they’re married. This gives us a
strong indication of what kind of people are in this world. Banditry and
barbarism abound, apparently, despite the flood. Looks like Noah didn’t do such
a good job of teaching people not to be jerks.
Pharoah
takes Sarai as his wife—thinking she is Abram’s sister because that’s the
scheme to keep Abram alive. And, yes, Pharaoh paid for her. I know, it’s a
deplorable treatment of women that Abram sells her off. I can’t defend this
from a modern standpoint. It’s reprehensible. However, this is a completely
different culture in which everything
has a value. Selling people is strictly routine. In fact, chances are good that
Sarai would have been proud of the price she got, consisting of “sheep, oxen,
male donkeys, male and female slaves, female donkeys, and camels.” These are
the foundations of wealth to one day become a king, all because of Sarai’s
value in the ancient world.
However, this is technically
illegal for Abram to do since he is married to Sarai. And God, apparently,
cares about such technicalities, and is true to his word about “bless[ing]
those who bless [Abram], and the ones who curse [him] [God] will curse” (Gen
12:3). As a result, “the Lord afflicted Pharaoh and his house with great
plagues” (Gen 12:17). This is interesting because it’s before the establishment
of a formal Covenant between God and Abram. If anything, this is a test of these
early terms, and God showing that he will follow-through. Kind of a free
sample, which pays out well for Abram as he and Sarai get to depart, with all
their stuff, unharmed.
Again, this
is more foreshadowing, but the results are more immediate than with the land
thing. Abram and Sarai will see great life changes relating to this
trial-period covenant. Hey, Abram is not just going ot sign up for himself, but
for generations. Forever. It’s good to get a sample of how that works.